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Private mediation uses a neutral professional to help spouses negotiate. A judge can decide unresolved issues and make orders. Court custody services focus on custody and parenting time. These paths can coexist within the same California divorce. California Courts
For advice about your own position, explore divorce representation in Los Angeles and Los Angeles child custody legal services.
Who decides in mediation and in court?
| Process | Who decides? | What does it handle? |
|---|---|---|
| Private mediation | Spouses decide whether to agree. The neutral mediator cannot impose a decision. | Negotiations about custody and parenting time, child or spousal support, and property or debt division. |
| Court custody services | Parents try to agree. A recommending counselor may recommend terms; the judge decides unresolved disputes. | Custody and parenting time only. These appointments do not resolve support or property issues. |
| Hearing or trial | A judge decides the issues presented and makes orders. | Contested custody or support requests, or unresolved divorce issues such as property division, depending on the proceeding. |
A private mediator facilitates discussion and does not represent either spouse. Each spouse can seek independent legal advice about proposed terms.
Check your Los Angeles custody appointment type
Los Angeles Superior Court says Family Court Services appointments may involve confidential mediation and/or Child Custody Recommending Counseling, known as CCRC. Read your appointment notice and ask Family Court Services which process applies.
Information sharing depends on the appointment type. Confidential mediation is a confidential process. In CCRC, the process and report are not confidential among the specialist, the court, the parties and their attorneys. They remain confidential from the public. Los Angeles Superior Court
Support and property questions need a separate agreement or court decision. The custody appointment focuses on a parenting plan.
Prepare for a custody appointment
Legal custody concerns who makes important decisions for your child, including education and health care. Physical custody concerns where your child lives. Either type can be joint or sole. Treat decision making and the parenting schedule as separate questions when preparing your proposal. California Courts
Build a proposal around the child’s routine
Start with your child’s routine and needs. Write a proposal detailed enough to show how an ordinary week would work. Consider the following details.
- School night and weekend schedules, with separate arrangements for holidays and vacations.
- Exchange times and locations. State who would handle transportation.
- How major decisions would be made and how necessary information would be shared.
- Arrangements that account for your child’s age or medical needs.
Explain why a disputed request would meet your child’s needs. California’s court mediation rule calls for a detailed parenting schedule and a description of each parent’s decision making authority. Judicial Branch of California
Los Angeles Family Court Services asks parents to complete its intake form before the appointment. Use it to explain your circumstances and the parenting issues that need attention. Los Angeles Superior Court
Separate agreed terms from open questions
List terms you both accept separately from terms still disputed. Do not describe an issue as settled if either parent has not agreed to it.
Ask how any partial agreement will be recorded and what happens next for the remaining issues. California’s court mediation rule requires an explanation of subsequent procedures for outstanding custody or visitation issues. You do not have to accept disputed terms simply to finish the discussion. Judicial Branch of California
Raise safety concerns promptly
Tell Family Court Services about coercion or abuse, including concerns for your child’s safety. Explain if fear or pressure prevents you from speaking freely. Ask to speak with the mediator alone and ask about separate sessions or a support person.
Ask what information may be shared, what confidentiality applies to your appointment, and what reporting obligations the mediator has. California Courts
Accommodations do not make mediation appropriate or safe for everyone. Seek advice from a lawyer or domestic violence advocate about protective options and whether private mediation is suitable for your circumstances.
If you or your child is in immediate danger, call 911. Do not wait for a mediation appointment to seek urgent help.
Separate child support from spousal support
Child support helps cover a child’s needs. Spousal support provides financial assistance to a spouse or former spouse. Address the two separately in your agreement.
California uses a guideline calculation for child support. The court needs the guideline figure when reviewing an agreement, even if parents propose a different amount. A proposed departure from the guideline remains subject to legal requirements and judicial review.
For spousal support, discuss whether payments will be made and their amount. Proposed terms should also explain payment arrangements and duration. California Courts
Exchange financial information before settling
Choosing mediation does not replace required financial disclosures. These cover income and expenses, along with what each spouse owns and owes. Review the supporting records before accepting support terms, and ask for clarification if information is missing.
If you are considering a waiver of final disclosures, ask how to complete the required waiver process. Preliminary disclosures have separate requirements. California Courts
Turn written terms into a court order or judgment
Once you agree, put the terms in writing and sign them. Those signatures alone do not create a court order or end your marriage. An agreement becomes a court order after the judge signs it and it is filed. California Courts
To finish an agreed divorce, submit the signed agreement with the required final forms. The judge reviews the paperwork before signing the judgment. The court’s Notice of Entry of Judgment identifies the date your marriage ends. Check that date rather than assuming your marriage ended when you signed the settlement.
If a local child support agency is involved, it must also approve and sign the child support agreement. California Courts
Request temporary relief or a decision on unresolved issues
You can ask for temporary child or spousal support while the divorce remains pending. You do not have to resolve the entire case before requesting those orders. California Courts
If support or other terms remain disputed, a Request for Order may allow a judge to decide specified issues at a hearing. Some disputes require a trial. At trial, the judge considers evidence and decides the unresolved issues. Negotiating an agreement on some questions does not prevent you from asking the court to decide the rest. California Courts
Four questions to choose your next step
When comparing divorce mediation vs. court in California, focus on what your next step needs to accomplish.
- What needs a decision now? Identify issues that cannot wait for an overall settlement. Ask about temporary court orders where needed. California Courts
- What is actually unresolved? Write down the disputed points and identify any terms you both accept. This gives your next discussion a specific purpose.
- Do I have enough information to evaluate an offer? Identify missing records or unclear wording before deciding whether proposed terms make sense.
- Can I participate without fear or pressure? If coercion or abuse affects participation, seek advice about protective options. Tell Family Court Services about concerns relevant to your appointment. California Courts
Prepare for the conversation and get independent advice
Gather current orders and appointment notices. Keep written proposals with the records needed to check them. Ask the professional you plan to meet which documents they want to review.
Make a short list of questions you need answered before accepting any terms. Include practical concerns about carrying out the agreement, as well as wording you do not understand.
Read the entire draft, including attachments. Check that the written terms match what you actually agreed to, and ask about language that could have consequences you have not discussed.
Ask an independent lawyer to review how a proposed agreement affects your rights and responsibilities before you sign. Confirm whether the professional you engage will represent you individually or act as a neutral, and clarify what the engagement covers. California Courts
Frequently asked questions
Does trying private mediation commit me to a settlement?
No. A mediator cannot impose terms. Agreeing to participate does not mean accepting a particular proposal. California Courts
What if I do not understand my court appointment notice?
Contact Family Court Services to confirm what is scheduled and what preparation it requests. Do not assume that a general explanation of mediation describes your particular appointment. Los Angeles Superior Court
Discuss your next step
Explore Los Angeles divorce mediation services and ask what role the firm would take in your matter. For your first meeting, use our checklist for preparing for a California divorce consultation.
To discuss your circumstances and ask about representation, contact Yang Law Offices.
This content is for general information only and is not legal advice. It does not create an attorney-client relationship.
Sources
- California Courts: Reach an agreement or go to trial
- California Courts: Resolve your dispute out of court
- California Courts: Family law agreements
- California Courts: Write out your divorce agreement
- Los Angeles Superior Court: Family Court Services appointment information
- California Courts: Custody mediation in cases with domestic violence
- California Courts: Share financial information
- California Courts: Written agreement with children
- California Rules of Court: Court-connected child custody mediation
